Motivations behind giving

• Three kinds of generosity
• Impure giving and motivations
• Generating motivation of pure giving
• Changing impure generosity to pure
• Types of pure giving
• Benefits of pure giving
• Generosity and the path

Taking delight in giving 04 (download)

The next session is very brief. It’s about three kinds of generosity. The first is the kind that is attached to the desire realm; the desire realm is the realm that we live in where there are many objects of desire. The second is the generosity attached to the form realm; the form realm is that realm that one gets born into due to their deep meditative stabilization, but because there is still a subtle kind of body, a physical form, they can practice generosity. 

There is one level in samsara above the form realm called the formless realm. It has four parts to it. Beings are born in the formless realm because of deep states of meditation, but they don’t have any bodies. There is no physical form, so one can’t practice generosity there—plus every being in the formless realm is in their own single-pointed meditation. So, there is no interaction with one another.
And then the third kind of generosity is the generosity that is not attached at all—that means it is the type of generosity that is practiced by the arya beings. Remember, aryas are those who have realized the nature of reality directly, non-conceptually, so when we say we take refuge in the Sangha, these are the beings that we’re taking refuge in. “Sangha refuge” doesn’t mean everybody who goes to a Buddhist Center. The monastic community is representative of the Sangha refuge, but the real Sangha refuge is those who have realized the nature of reality through their own direct experience. That’s actually important; otherwise, people get very confused.

What we take refuge in

They say, “I take refuge in the Buddha—okay. I take refuge in the Dharma. I’m not sure what that is, but I’m practicing it even though I am not sure what it is. I take refuge in the Sangha, meaning all these people who go to Buddhist centers? But they’re no better than I am. They’re confused; they’re not keeping the precepts. How are they the refuge that’s going to lead me to enlightenment?”  Well, they aren’t. They are your Dharma community; they’re your community of fellow practitioners who are your Dharma friends, and you encourage each other and rely on each other. But the Sangha that’s going to lead you to enlightenment are those who have direct meditative experience of the nature of reality. Otherwise, it’s the visually impaired leading the visually impaired, isn’t it? 

Similarly, I always kind of chuckle when I go to retreat centers and we’re all called “yogis.” [laughter] Yogis? Excuse me? Yogis are great meditators with renunciation and bodhicitta and single-pointed concentration and an understanding of reality, and who are very disciplined in their meditation practice. Are we yogis or are we vacationers? [laughter] We may be aspiring yogis, but it might be awhile—at least for me.

Anyway, back to this text—it goes on to talk about two kinds of giving, two kinds of generosity: (1) that which is pure and (2) that which is impure. And here “pure” and “impure” refer to the motivation, because remember, generosity is not just the physical or verbal act, it’s the mental factor of intention that is together with other mental factors that spur the physical and verbal action. So, first the text talks about impure generosity. It’s the kind that we know pretty well. [laughter] 

Types of impure giving

It may involve superficial giving in which one takes no interest. 

There are so many times during the day when we give people things, but we don’t take the opportunity to connect with the receiver, or to look them in the eye, or to feel like, “I’m going to really give them something that they want.”  We just say, “Here . . . ”

We’re missing an opportunity. Even when somebody says, “Please pass the ketchup,” you have an opportunity. There are different ways of passing the ketchup, aren’t there? Depending how you pass it, you can be generous, you can connect and show kindness, or you can be on automatic. So, this refers to giving in which we take no interest.

Giving is really an opportunity we should avail ourselves of. In the Tibetan community, at least the way I was trained, you’re taught to give with both hands, and there is something quite beautiful about giving with both hands rather than just giving with one hand. Giving with both hands is giving with an attitude of humility and an attitude of respect, instead of just, “Eh… I’m worthless, you’re worthless, this is worthless, and we’re all playing a game.” It’s a small thing, but we can make it into something meaningful if we’re careful. 

Here are more kinds of impure generosity:

Giving may perhaps be done for the sake of obtaining wealth. 

We give a small present in hopes that they’ll give us a big one. But we don’t bribe people, do we? Only politicians do that; we don’t. We never give someone a small present hoping they’ll give us a big one.

Or perhaps one gives because one feels shame. 

In other words, we feel lousy about ourselves, so we give out some kind of contorted feeling of unworthiness or shame. That’s not an especially good motivation. 

Or perhaps one gives as a means of reproving others.

What would be an example of that? 

Audience: Giving back—they have given to us so I’m going to give back to them.

Venerable Thubten Chodron (VTC): That’s a good example. You have been very generous; I’m giving this much. So, it’s a way to put somebody else down, reproving somebody. 

Or perhaps we give out of terror. 

What would be an example of that? We’re getting mugged, and they say, “Give me your wallet!” How about giving it out of generosity then instead of out of terror? 

Or perhaps one gives to draw favorable attention to one’s self. 

What’s an example of that? [laughter] We have to support the stadium and the grand projects! 

Or perhaps one gives out of fear of being killed. 

What’s an example of that? 

Audience: You’re getting mugged and they’re going to kill you.

Venerable Thubten Chodron: Yes, you’re getting mugged, somebody breaks in your house, or maybe you’re living in a situation in which an army comes in and occupies your town or your village and you have to give out of the demand that you feed the army that’s occupying. 

Or perhaps one gives with the intention of manipulating someone into feeling pleased. 

I’m sure you can think of an example of this one. You give to manipulate someone into feeling pleased. 

Audience: When you give someone something nice to them so they will do a favor for you.

VTC: Oh, so when you want to soften up your husband so you can ask him for something so you make a nice dinner of his favorite food. [laughter] Or when you’re a kid, you soften up your parents by being really nice and then you ask for something. 

Or perhaps one gives out of a feeling of obligation. This because one happens to be rich and of noble rebirth or noble birth.

 In other words, this is something that the really wealthy families in the US used to feel last century—the Rockafellers, the Carnegies, the Kennedys, and so forth. They felt, “We have some fortune in our economic situation, so we have an obligation to give some of that back to society.” So, they set up nonprofit organizations and so on. 

There’s a way of doing that where it is really with good motivation and then there’s a way where it’s strictly obligation and without the real feeling of offering service. But how often do we give out of obligation? At Christmas time, how often? How many of your gifts are obligation and how many of them are because you really want to give? And is there a way for you to transform the gifts given out of obligation into ones given with a real sense of generosity? Is that possible to do? 

Or perhaps one gives as a means of struggling for dominance. 

What’s an example of that?

Audience: My parents are Chinese and they both want to be the one to pay for like 2,500 different kinds of. . .

VTC: They want to put ledgers in their friends face to fight for dominance, to show how generous you are, so you fight over who’s going to pay the bill at a restaurant. 

Audience: Fundraisers

VTC: “Thanks for the hint.” [laughter] So, when you go to a fundraiser, you wear a little symbol on your lapel to indicate how much you’ve given, so everybody else can see and then there is this kind of competition. 

Audience: ..of Prabhatara and Manjushri and . . .  [laughter]

VTC: Or you start off with the first bhumi and then the second bhumi! [laughter] Actually, this is something that we’ve had a hard time with at the Abbey because many Buddhist organizations have ranks of members, ranks of patrons, ranks of donors, and things like that. We just decided we weren’t going to do that because we want people to give from their hearts and it’s their kind motivation, not the amount that they give. And it’s very funny how people need something like that sometimes to feel motivated to give more than a dollar. [laughter] We’re so funny, aren’t we? We want something now so that we can shine a little bit. 

Or perhaps one gives out of jealousy. 

What’s an example of that?

Audience: Maybe you want to appear better than someone else so you give more or you give something better?

VTC: Yeah, it’s another way of competing. You’re jealous of someone who has given more, so you give more. 

Audience: Vying for “love”of family members.

VTC: Oh right, how sets of grandparents act with their grandchildren; they kind of “one-up” who is giving more.

Audience: Trying to gain the affection of a boyfriend/girlfriend.

VTC: When you’re wooing somebody, like when somebody else sent one kind of flower, you have to send a better kind of flower. 

Or perhaps one gives out of hatred.

What’s an example of that? How about somebody who is using somebody else and wants to hurt them so they want that person to get attached to them and like them, so they can dump them or hurt them in some way? That’s pretty nasty. 

Or perhaps one gives out of arrogance, desiring to elevate one’s self above others.

 This is one we do a lot, isn’t it? “I want to be known as more generous than the other person.” 

Or perhaps one gives for the sake of fame or reputation. 

“I want to get the building named after me, get a plaque in the front of the thing named after me; at the invocation ceremony of the special program, they thank me in particular”—something like that to get fame or reputation.

Or perhaps one gives out of an attempt to lend efficacy to ritual incantations and prayers. 

So, you’re just doing some kind of ritual, not understanding it, not knowing why, but you figure you might as well make an offering to please the gods in some way. Like when they pass the plate, but of course when they pass the plate, there could be any number of reasons…

Or perhaps one gives in an attempt to do away with misfortune and gain good fortune.

 So, you might have the idea that by giving you’ll bring good energy to yourself. That’s certainly better than giving with hatred. 

Or perhaps one gives in order to gain a following. 

So, you want to be well known; you want to have a group of people that follow you. So, you give things to them, or you give whatever they’re asking for to them, and then they think you’re really wonderful and follow you.

Or perhaps one gives in a disrespectful fashion in order to slight someone and make them feel humble.

Sometimes we might do this if we’re giving to somebody who is living on the street. We just kind of give to them like, “You slob. You can’t even work; you’re living on welfare—here.” But we give something. That’s not very nice to humiliate somebody like that, is it? But you see people do it.

All the various sorts of giving such as these are classed as impure giving. 

Can you think of other forms of impure giving? Any kinds of impure giving that you may have done that’s not listed here?

Audience: Giving to assuage guilt.

VTC: Yeah, giving out of guilt to make yourself feel better. Can you think of others?

Audience: Giving something that may not have been freely given to you.

VTC: So giving something you got in a not so honest way. You may give it to look good, or you may give it to alleviate your guilt, or you may give it to get rid of the stuff before the police find it! [laughter] What else?

Audience: To fit in with the crowd.

VTC: That’s kind of like the first one. You do it out of peer pressure: “Everybody else is doing it, so I don’t want to look bad.”

Audience: Giving something to appease someone.

VTC: You’re completely worn down and you just want to get them off your back, so you give them something already. 

Audience: Buying food for someone who is begging.

VTC: If you know somebody’s a junkie, I think buying something for them to eat is a good way to be giving generosity because you are controlling them, but you’re controlling in a certain way in the sense that you don’t want to feed their junkie habit, but they do need nourishing food and you don’t want to give them money because they’ll go misuse it. I think actually that’s something quite nice to do.

Audience: Re-gifting.

VTC: Okay, that’s something somebody gave you that you don’t like, so you find somebody else to give it to. [laughter] I just had this flash. Before I became a nun I was married, and at our wedding, one of the presents we got was this kind of gift that this person got that she didn’t like and gave to us. You know how they used to have those little ceramic hors d’oeuvres things? It was one of those, and it had a little pineapple in the center, and all the dishes had a little Hawaiian—[laughter]. I’m sure somebody had given this to that person and she thought we were wacky enough to want it. [laughter]

Audience: What did you eventually do with it?

VTC: I gave it to somebody else! [Laughter] It’s like at Christmastime, they make one fruitcake and it just keeps getting gifted. [laughter] 

Audience: Do you think it’s possible you could have given it to her cousin? [laughter]

VTC: I probably did. [laughter]

Pure giving

Then pure giving: 

As for pure giving, any giving which stands in opposition to the above examples qualifies as pure giving.

We can see how easily we fall into impure giving, but the situation can very easily be changed to one of pure giving simply by changing our mind. In other words, to stop the impure giving, it doesn’t mean we don’t give at all until we have a pure motivation. It means we change the mind with which we’re giving.

So, those same situations in which we might be giving out of obligation or feeling like we’re manipulated or whatever, we stop, we change our mind. We really think about the benefits of giving for the other person, for ourselves; we develop a spirit of kindness, and a real extensive wish that so many people benefit from our gift. Even if our gift is not millions of whatever, through our virtuous motivation, may it benefit so many different people. We really stop and change our motivation. Then that same action can be changed into a pure action of giving from an impure action. 

Sometimes when we start really looking at our motivation, we see how sometimes our motivations aren’t very good.  Then we just stop doing things altogether. If you’re doing something non-virtuous—killing, stealing, sleeping around, lying, that stuff—yes, stop doing those if your motivation is bad, but if you’re doing something that could be beneficial to others, don’t stop doing it because you think your motivation is bad. Change your motivation into a good one.

One example of this that I found is, in some countries, the lay Buddhists feel—and it’s taught very much in the scriptures—that if you give to the sangha community, you create a lot of merit, and it’s very good for your future rebirths. So, in countries like Thailand, the people really have very deep faith in that, and so they’re quite generous with the sangha. And then I see some Westerners come in and say, “Oh look, those lay people, they’re just giving because they want something good in their future life. They’re so selfish wanting something good for themselves and their future life. I’m not going to fall for that kind of stuff.” And they don’t give at all, thinking that they’re superior to these people who are giving because they want to have wealth in their future lives.

No, that’s not it. Of course, giving to have wealth in our future life is a virtuous motivation. Giving to have wealth in this life is manipulating and conniving. But if we give with a free mind, wishing for wealth in a future life, it’s a good motivation. It is not the best motivation because that motivation can still be purified to seeking liberation, seeking enlightenment. So, it’s not a totally pure motivation, but it is a virtuous one.  But then other people say, “Well, it’s not the best,  purest motivation, which I must have,” and then they don’t give anything. [laughter] We shouldn’t be like that. It’s self-defeating. 

Giving for the sake of the path is pure giving.  

So, this is giving with an aspiration to be able to actualize the path to enlightenment. 

When a pure mind arises which is devoid of any of the fetters [fetters are things like ignorance, jealousy, arrogance, sensual desire, attachment, ill will, doubt], or when one is not seeking for any reward in this or future lives, or when one does so out of reverence or sympathy, these circumstances all qualify as pure giving.

So, a pure mind which is devoid of any of the fetters means you don’t have any fetters in your mind. You have perhaps realized the ultimate nature and started on the process of eliminating the fetters from the root, and then you give with that kind of intention, which isn’t just the lack of fetters, but when you have kindness and benevolence and so forth in your mind, then that’s pure giving. 

Or when we’re not seeking any reward in this or future lives.

So, we’re not seeking a reward in this life, which I said before is a way of manipulating. Here it says “future lives” because Nagarjuna is pushing us towards enlightenment. Giving for the benefit of future lives is virtuous, but in terms of the bodhisattva practice—which is what he’s talking about here when he’s talking about the six far reaching practices—you don’t want to be giving for the sake of your own future life. You want to be giving with the bodhicitta motivation.

Or when one does so out of reverence or sympathy.

When we have real deep respect for whomever or whatever we’re giving to, or we have a feeling of kindness and compassion and really wanting to help, these circumstances all qualify as pure giving. We can see that when we give, we’re getting out of ourself in one way or another. Then the mind changes, and it’s simply a thing of changing the thought.

During our meditations we always begin with generating our motivation; so too, when we give a gift, we should think about our motivation and generate a good motivation and then make an offering. Similarly to when we offer our food before we eat, we think of the qualities of the Three Jewels and offer with a sense of reverence; we offer with a belief in karma; we offer with the aspiration to become a Buddha to benefit all beings. And then we eat to preserve our health, not for some egocentric reason. 

Then, the solitary effects of pure giving:  

Pure giving creates the provisions for moving on along the path to nirvana, hence we speak of giving for the sake of the path. If one performs acts of giving prior to that time, when one might be inclined to strive for realization of nirvana, it creates the cause for the enjoyment of blissful future retribution among gods and humans.

So, giving for the sake of the path is wanting to attain nirvana or enlightenment. When we give with that kind of motivation and dedication, that’s when it happens. If prior to that time, when we’ve had any thought of gaining liberation or any thought of realizations, but if we gave with still a respectful attitude, an attitude of kindness, it creates the cause to enjoy wealth in our future life—a blissful future retribution amongst humans and celestial beings. 

Pure giving is like a floral wreath when first made and not yet withered, which is fragrant, pure, fresh, and radiant. Similarly, when one performs acts of pure giving for the sake of nirvana, one consequently becomes able to enjoy, as an incidental benefit, the fragrance of karmic rewards even prior to reaching nirvana.

So, it’s what I was saying before—we give with a motivation of our long term goal, and that enables us to have the provisions that we need while we’re still in samsara in order to be able to practice the Dharma.

As the Buddha said, there are two types of people who are rarely encountered in the world. The first among those are those who have left home, [a monastic] who eats at the improper time and succeeds in gaining liberation.

What it’s talking about is a monastic who doesn’t keep their vows well and attains liberation. That is something that’s rare. The second thing that’s rare is:

Among the white-robed householders, [white-robed is because in India the householders, the lay people, wore white] something rare among them is one who is able to perform an act of pure giving.

[laughter] That doesn’t mean we give up. It means we keep trying, doesn’t it? 

In life after life, the mark of pure giving is never lost, even after countless lifetimes.

If we create pure giving with a good intention, then that karma doesn’t get lost—especially if we’ve dedicated it for full enlightenment. If we’ve just dedicated it for wealth in a future life, it will ripen as that and then be finished. If we dedicate it for full enlightenment, it doesn’t get lost until full enlightenment is attained. 

It is like a title deed which never loses its validity, even to the very end.

So, it’s a mortgage that’s never subprime! [laughter] This actually reminds me of another story. We had a friend of ours from Boise who came up to the Abbey, and he told us this story of when his father passed away; he got an inheritance—about $18,000.00. He invested it—this was in the dot com age—so the value of the investment was going up and up and up, and he was going, “Whoa, this is good! My $18,000 is increasing, and I’m going to get really wealthy.”

It went up and up, and he said, “I could have taken it out, but I was greedy and I wanted more, so I left it in,” and then the whole thing collapsed. And he said, at the end, all he had was $150.00 left of his father’s inheritance. Then what he did with it was to send it as an offering to one of the nuns at the Abbey with a letter that was so touching, telling this whole story and saying, “Now I realize I have to invest in something that’s secure.” He gave with a real heart that has faith in karma and especially wanting to help support her in her spiritual practice. It’s a beautiful story. 

This root of giving comes forth when the appropriate causes and conditions all come together. This is analogous to the fruit tree, which, when it encounters the right season, then has flowers, fruits, leaves, and seeds. If the season has not yet arrived, even though the causes may be present, no corresponding fruit will yet come forth.

This is what I was saying before about be content to create the causes, and just give, and constantly generate a good motivation again and again and again. Don’t be all attentive for when you’re going to get the results of your giving because when you do, it pollutes the motivation. Whereas if we just give, with faith that causes bring results, then when all the conditions come together, that karmic seed will ripen.

Questions & Answers

Audience: I just had a question about you saying the householder will never give purely; how does that relate to the sutra.

VTC: I think maybe that it came across wrong. I wasn’t saying that the householder doesn’t give purely. The Buddha was saying that there are rare things; one rare thing is a monastic who doesn’t keep their vows well yet attains liberation and another is a householder who is capable of generating that really pure motivation. In other words, what he’s pointing out is that most often householders are just giving out of obligation, or to win friends, or something like that. The Buddha wasn’t putting householders down, and he certainly wasn’t talking about everybody who’s a householder. Is that clear? You don’t look convinced. [laughter] 

So, what the Buddha is doing is really pointing out to us that we need to work on our motivation; he isn’t making a prediction. He’s not putting everybody in one category. But if we look in the world, how often do we see actions of pure giving? We see them sometimes, don’t we? But we also see a lot of actions of impure giving, so it was in that kind of way, to just wake us up. 

Consider that you have an opportunity to be generous, so be like Vimalakirti or be like Anathapindika. Or be like Visakha. Be like these people, or be like Jivaka who at the time of the Buddha was a doctor who offered through medical service. Be like that kind of person because we have the opportunity to do that.