Transforming the Complaining Mind

I wanted to give an example of what it means when our text states, “Speaking neither unpleasantly nor deceptively” and “Keeping the mind absorbed in the spiritually beneficial.” I have noticed that sometimes my speech is involved in complaining, especially regarding having to think so much about Chenrezig Hall. “I’ve gotta think about this; I’ve gotta think about that; we need all this money, and there are all these decisions to make—da da da da. Why can’t I have winter retreat without thinking about all this stuff?” That is the opposite of speaking neither unpleasantly nor deceptively. That is complaining.

Then the other line was “Keeping the mind absorbed in the spiritually beneficial.” So then I have to somehow do something because it’s miserable complaining—for myself and for everybody around me. I was thinking this morning about when we were planning the building with the architect. It was all very exciting, and we were quite eager imagining this big building that will help the community grow. So many more Sangha members will come here, and that will be so good for society. And then so many lay people can come and meet the Dharma and meditate, which will really help them in their lives now and in future lives. People can really go towards liberation and enlightenment.

That’s how we were thinking at the beginning, and I have to still think like that now instead of getting caught up in the small details, like where does this board go and what color is this going to be? It’s important instead to really keep the big picture in mind. This building is really for the benefit of the long-term existence of the monastic Sangha in the West. It’s really to benefit all of society, and it’s for the guests and lay people who come so they can learn the Dharma. 

Then I was thinking that this is actually big purification regarding those two groups of people. How many times in previous lives have I stolen from the Sangha or slandered the Sangha or criticized the Sangha or created who knows what kind of horrible karma in relation to the Sangha? And not only in previous lives; sometimes in this life, too. And regarding sentient beings in general, how much have I complained and criticized and stolen and cheated and done all sorts of horrible things in relation to them?

So, this building of Chenrezig Hall is actually a way to purify all this negative karma by doing something constructive that will really benefit these two groups of people in the long-term. That kind of karma is horrible, especially the karma against the Sangha. And if I’m able to purify that simply on the basis of deciding what color something is or how high or what shape the coffered ceiling is—by deciding these kinds of details—then I’m actually getting off pretty easily for having created so much negative karma. Because going through all of this planning and building and executing the whole thing is not that painful. It’s nothing compared to being born in the lower realms. I’m actually getting off pretty easy. That’s an example of transforming the mind into something spiritually beneficial. When you do that, the complaining mind stops because then you say, “Oh, I’m able to create so much merit and to do so much purification, and it’s really not that difficult.” 

Also, when I was thinking about it not being so difficult, I realized that I’m not the people out there building in the snow and freezing every day. I went out occasionally but then came back in where it’s warm, and they are the ones who have to be around all the loud noises and do all the work. There are so many things to think of with everything. I could never design the trusses, for example—unless I went back to my tenth grade Geometry class. I could never do any of the things that require knowledge of structural engineering. So, actually, what I’m doing in helping to construct this building isn’t very much at all. I don’t know how to do most of it except go out there and take a look and complain. [laughter] I have my Ph.D in complaining. [laughter] 

The building is getting built because of the efforts of the people working on it and because of all the people donating money. So, all those people who are donating money, right this very moment, while I’m sitting here twiddling my thumbs and contemplating dependent arising, are working really hard and sometimes in really difficult situations. They might not get along with their boss or their colleagues; they might be worried about keeping their jobs or finding a job; they have all sorts of problems. And they have to pay taxes. And this building is coming about because of the benefactors and the people building it. 

All I’m doing is connecting the two in helping the benefactors see that they can put their resources into something that matches their values, and then helping the builders see that they are doing something really valuable for sentient beings in the long-term. So, really, I’m not doing very much. The benefactors are the ones who are working for the money, and the builders are the ones doing the physical labor. What am I doing? I’m making plans and decisions, but that’s all I’m doing. It’s not very much at all. I was really thinking about that this morning. 

This is an example of transforming your mind and getting it going in the right direction. Then hopefully you can stop the mouth and the mind of complaining.

Humbly submitted. [laughter]