Leading a discussion on forgiveness

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Afternoon session of the October 28 workshop conducted at Kong Meng San Phor Kark See Monastery in Singapore on October 27-28 and November 26, 2001

Establishing a topic and reflection questions

  • What does it mean to forgive?
  • Who do you want to forgive?
  • What prevents you from forgiving?
  • How can you forgive yourself and have an open heart?

Trg III 01: Forgiving (download)

Group’s reflections on forgiveness exercise

  • Hardest to forgive those we are closest to
  • Forgiveness benefits the other and self so healing can occur
  • Separate the person from the act
  • We think that by not forgiving, we are punishing the person and they will reform and change, but that doesn’t really happen

Trg III 02: Forgiving (download)

Emotions and forgiveness

  • Dealing with memories
  • The mind as creator of our experience
  • Layers of forgiveness
  • Global dimension
  • Reduce hurt and anger through “letting go”

Trg III 03: Forgiving (download)

Steps for leading a discussion

  • Summarize what will happen
  • Do breathing meditation
  • Review each question
  • Instruct how to do groups (length each person speaks, etc.)
  • Remind about the questions
  • Break into groups
  • Debrief, restate with the prominent points, pull different perspectives together.

Trg III 04: Review (download)

More tips and homework

  • Instruct group on their behavior towards the leader
  • Size of groups, planning ahead

Trg III 05: Tips and homework (download)

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